Selfish

I am be being selfish right now but a good friend told me that it was time to. All my counselors I've been to and professors and mentor's I've confided in have said that I need to take time for myself. I have problems doing this.
I'm really sick of estrogen levels. I've been hanging out with the same 3 people for basically the past week and they have been a great refresher and make me not miss the drama that is contained within this dorm. Unneeded. Uncalled for. Useless.
Yet, I sat there and cried about how stressed and frustrated I was once I got back to campus.

There is just going to be a lot more change going on in my life and it's not necessarily comfortable change and I have to be open to it. I haven't been. I haven't even been willingly to let myself be open to any sort of change that isn't convient for me.

I may be being selfish. I am just sick of expectations that aren't followed out of courtesy in return or unneeded drama and everything. I am on my last end and for some reason I'm having trouble with patience.

I'm sorry if this hurts anyone.

I just quit making an effort and I will again. I'll end up apologizing and kneeing on my knees.

I'm just brain dead right now.

Coincidences or Godwinks?

Last night, I was doing my devotions and when I opened up April 2nd the topic was death - one of my best friend's dad died yesterday.
For days and maybe the past week, I have written papers, read books and sermons, had multiple different classes taught about wealth and riches. Then I picked the unopened Nooma entitled Rich. I am talking to God and wondering what He wants me to get out of these similar relating things that are going on in my life.
I'm not making much sense yet...